- How effective, specific, interesting, and appropriate is the title of the paper? Is it fun and inventive? How well does it help to draw you into the paper? Please suggest an alternative.
- How interesting is the first (introductory) paragraph? Does it interest you and does it compel you to read on? Does it provide vital information or lead the reader smoothly into the paper? Does it leadsmoothly into the thesis? Suggest an idea or improvement that might introduce the essay more effectively and “hook” the reader a bit better.
- Is the thesis clear enough and easily identified (at the end of the first paragraph)? How well does the thesis match the assignment (about one’s Personal Legend)? How well does the paper develop the thesis (meaning that the thesis and the body of the essay match or are unified)? How could the thesis be improved?
- Are the sentences in the paper clear and concise or are some awkward, wordy, and unclear, for example? Comment on sentences that might use some further revision.
- Identify a good descriptive passage in the paper. Do the images appeal to most of the five senses? How well does the description help the reader to imagine people, objects, places, and events important the writer’s Personal Legend? Find at least one place where more description would be helpful. Where are figures of speech used (and underlined)? Evaluate their effectiveness.
- Are concrete and proper nouns used whenever possible? Are many or most verbs active and specific? How well do these word choices help the reader to understand the events surrounding the writer’s Personal Legend? Evaluate the diction (word choices) in the paper.
- Is this setting (or are the settings) of the narrative described adequately? What could be added to make the setting more complete and vividly imagined to help the reader experience the development of the writer’s Personal Legend?
- Who are the characters here? Do characters speak? Is there adequate description of them and information provided about them to imagine them and experience their involvement in the writer’s legend? Suggest improvements.
- What do you like most about the paper? What could use the most work?
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